Hefei Expat - China

Expat English => Discussions and opinions => Topic started by: Andy72 on January 12, 2011, 11:57:37 PM

Title: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 12, 2011, 11:57:37 PM
..i want to start this topic (cannot find any similar) taking from a sidestepping direction started on a differnt topic here:
http://hefeiexpat.com/forum/i'm-looking-for/info-on-whether-i-should-move-to-hefei-or-not/msg5402/#msg5402 (http://hefeiexpat.com/forum/i'm-looking-for/info-on-whether-i-should-move-to-hefei-or-not/msg5402/#msg5402)

so, as YetAnotherCanadian was saying, that several foreigners think it is impolite:

-staring ... staring ... staring ... staring
-burping/farting aloud in public
-saying 'LAO WAI!' loudly every time you see a foreign person
-taking pictures of foreign people (this is very, VERY rude!  Please do not do this.)
-yelling on your phone when you're in a public place
-spitting

and for me, as i mentioned earlier, what really pi$$ me off is:

people staring constantly in my shopping basket when in shops..
ohhh, i hate that!!!

so, what do you hate?

and it would be cool if our Chinese friends would start a similar topic, what they hate about us (ok, my staring back at Chinese pretty girl's legs is probably one of those things!  ;D )
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 13, 2011, 12:07:37 AM
I'll add two:

-I hate how sometimes I will say 'hello' to someone walking through the hall where I work (I don't know them, I'm just being friendly) and they will stare at me like I am some kind of alien.  I think they want to say 'why are you saying hello to me, you loser!'

-I hate how most local people seem to have no consideration for the comfort of people around them (driving motorcycles on the sidewalk is a good example).  Or, where I live, the garbage gets picked up at 5 in the morning.  But instead of being quiet (like most civilized people), the garbage lads throw around the garbage cans, break bottles, yell at each other, etc!  I can never sleep!!  Luckily, the garbage collection is only once per week.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 13, 2011, 12:17:01 AM
I also hate all the lying.  Maybe it's different in Hefei, but here most things locals tell me turn out to be not true.  >:(  I don't understand how the economy can operate efficiently when you can't believe anything anyone says!  ???
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: lewin on January 13, 2011, 02:31:39 AM
Dear Canadian,

1. Try learning 'Ni hao' and some other useful phrases. I work on the assumption that I have no God-given right to expect a Chinese to speak even a word of English to me. If they do, then I am lucky and life is a little easier. Greetings such as 'Ni chi guo la ma?' are common. But generally speaking, Chinese don't greet random strangers walking by. I admit the rule is sometimes broken for laowais--but not always.

It's also true that if they respond in English, they might feel like you’ll try to further the conversation in English and they’ll be shown lacking.

2. Chinese have enormous consideration for each other (and for laowais) in the social sphere. You only have to partake in a few dinners with colleagues or family to experience what I mean. People will select the best food and make sure you have it. They'll make sure you're seated at the most important position at the table. They'll drink to you first. I arrived in a new city late in evening and hadn't booked a hotel. A travelling businessman went out of his way to assist me find a clean and affordable place. Why? Because once someone had done the same for him. I was walking in the rain without an umbrella and a Chinese student came over and let me walk under hers. Chinese also put much thought and expense into buying gifts for each other. There are countless examples...

When you live in populous places, some things in life are a little harder. The bus to and from work every day is jammed with people, supermarket lines are long, the wait at the bank or post office can be frustrating, taxis might be scarce when you really need one,  there's a noisy school next to your apartment, lots of dirty construction happening to accomodate more people etc. etc.  Daily life requires more patience and less sensitivity to physical inconveniences. This can (but not always) result in a lack of sensitivity to others on the street. I asked a Chinese friend about this once and he said that first and foremost people must have a stronger sense of their own safety and wellbeing, then it will be ‘morphed’ to others. It is part of the human condition, and I have experienced exactly the same in Western cities where there are many people.

p.s. You should seriously avoid using the word 'civilized' like you understand what that means, newfie.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 13, 2011, 03:31:42 AM
1 - chinese don't greet random foreigners???? rule is broken sometimes?????
where do you live????  :P

where i live, south of hefei, sorry, it's completely the opposite!!
and they are so happy when i answer some "ni hao, "ni chi LE ma?"  ;D

maybe you live in an area with many foreigners.. or you never go out!
kidding of course..

but when i started this thread i was more thinking about what i wrote in the title..
and still i think that most of us, foreigners here, are enjoying staying here.. nobody is obliged to stay.. (i speak mainly for myself)
so do not take too bad the comments we write..

also no need to state comments like "Daily life requires more patience and less sensitivity to physical inconveniences".. keep them for church meeting maybe..
i was trying to get some fun and funny comments from our cultural shocks..
for those sentences, i can get a fortune cookie..

so, relax mate, keep your smile and tell us what YOU did not like and learnt to accept!

don't understand your need to take so seriously every words written here..

please, don't get angry with me or my bad english  and keep your smile!!

andy
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 13, 2011, 03:34:18 AM
besides, dear Lewin i would really love if some chinese or maybe people that seem to know chinese society and tradition so well would start a parallel thread:

Things done by laowai considered impolite by locals

really!!
please, anything.. keeping a smile!!!
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: ebby on January 13, 2011, 04:02:16 AM
@Lewin,  I can understand how you feel, but you are not sincere , I don't know how many years you 've spent in China but it's obvious except you don't want to say the truth.

 However, let's stick to the point , things foreigners considered impolite.

1. There is no'SORRY' in their dictionary. Bumping into you anywhere,anytime is considered normal and even laugh it off like nothing happened.

2. Where are you from?  I experience this more than 100 times daily. ( To know who and who we should associate ourselves with)

3. How old are you?  I am older than you, so you should call me ..blaaaablaaaaa...

4. What about calling you names especially when you are 'coloured'
 
5.Crowding around you when you are discussing with a friend 'LACK OF RESPECT FOR PRIVACY'
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 13, 2011, 04:52:52 AM
Dear Canadian,

1. Try learning 'Ni hao' and some other useful phrases. I work on the assumption that I have no God-given right to expect a Chinese to speak even a word of English to me. If they do, then I am lucky and life is a little easier. Greetings such as 'Ni chi guo la ma?' are common. But generally speaking, Chinese don't greet random strangers walking by. I admit the rule is sometimes broken for laowais--but not always.

It's also true that if they respond in English, they might feel like you’ll try to further the conversation in English and they’ll be shown lacking.

2. Chinese have enormous consideration for each other (and for laowais) in the social sphere. You only have to partake in a few dinners with colleagues or family to experience what I mean. People will select the best food and make sure you have it. They'll make sure you're seated at the most important position at the table. They'll drink to you first. I arrived in a new city late in evening and hadn't booked a hotel. A travelling businessman went out of his way to assist me find a clean and affordable place. Why? Because once someone had done the same for him. I was walking in the rain without an umbrella and a Chinese student came over and let me walk under hers. Chinese also put much thought and expense into buying gifts for each other. There are countless examples...

When you live in populous places, some things in life are a little harder. The bus to and from work every day is jammed with people, supermarket lines are long, the wait at the bank or post office can be frustrating, taxis might be scarce when you really need one,  there's a noisy school next to your apartment, lots of dirty construction happening to accomodate more people etc. etc.  Daily life requires more patience and less sensitivity to physical inconveniences. This can (but not always) result in a lack of sensitivity to others on the street. I asked a Chinese friend about this once and he said that first and foremost people must have a stronger sense of their own safety and wellbeing, then it will be ‘morphed’ to others. It is part of the human condition, and I have experienced exactly the same in Western cities where there are many people.

p.s. You should seriously avoid using the word 'civilized' like you understand what that means, newfie.


Hi Lewin,

I'm sorry my post pissed you off enough that you had to open an account here to reply (I notice that your rant marks your first post at this forum).

If my reference to people throwing garbage around at 5 in the morning as 'uncivilized' doesn't match your definition of the same word, then I'll rephrase it as 'inconsiderate'.  One thing I don't get is why you tout yourself as someone who hates labels, yet you label me a 'newfie'?  Do you know what that word even means?

Anyway, as I stated before, these are just a few of the things that piss me off about China, and I encouraged our local friends to retort with things that piss them off about foreigners.  Andy made it clear this thread is for a bit of tongue-in-cheek fun, perhaps not suited for the overly-sensitive.

Maybe when I get to Hefei, you can take me out for dinner.  Then let's be civilized and get real drunk and walk through family areas of Hefei, breaking bottles and yelling at 3 in the morning.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 13, 2011, 05:19:49 AM
1 - chinese don't greet random foreigners???? rule is broken sometimes?????
where do you live????  :P

where i live, south of hefei, sorry, it's completely the opposite!!
and they are so happy when i answer some "ni hao, "ni chi LE ma?"  ;D

maybe you live in an area with many foreigners.. or you never go out!
kidding of course..

but when i started this thread i was more thinking about what i wrote in the title..
and still i think that most of us, foreigners here, are enjoying staying here.. nobody is obliged to stay.. (i speak mainly for myself)
so do not take too bad the comments we write..

also no need to state comments like "Daily life requires more patience and less sensitivity to physical inconveniences".. keep them for church meeting maybe..
i was trying to get some fun and funny comments from our cultural shocks..
for those sentences, i can get a fortune cookie..

so, relax mate, keep your smile and tell us what YOU did not like and learnt to accept!

don't understand your need to take so seriously every words written here..

please, don't get angry with me or my bad english  and keep your smile!!

andy

Haha, nobody is making fun of your English!  (If you heard my Italian, you'd laugh!)

I hope this thread hasn't been killed.  Would love to hear from some of the other users on this site!  If you're foreign/Chinese, post what pisses you off!  :P

My wife (Chinese), hates how foreign people (well, me in this case) don't normally shower before bed.  I now shower both in the morning and at night.  :)
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 13, 2011, 05:26:57 AM
please please, make your wife starting the parallel thread of what chinese hate about us!!!

 ;D

i'll ask my chinese friends...

maybe something like:

1 - when you walk around you don't say "ni hao" to all of us
2 - you oblige your poor children to wear diapers and not go freely in the nature
3 - you don't enjoy drinking baijiu from normal water glasses but you always ask for the tiny ones...

 ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 13, 2011, 07:22:42 AM
lol actually, one thing I don't hate about China is bai jiu.  It's a perfect winter drink (aside from the fact you feel like hell the next few days).  :P

My wife says she hates how foreign people wear too much perfume (actually, I used to wear it to until she told me to stop).
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Joeyhf on January 13, 2011, 07:49:08 AM
Chinese  people like to be a  "FIRST IN ROW"  ;D
Everybody want to board plane or train first ,even have seat reservation ;D .
Driving car in China is the same.Everybody want to be a First.

I hate when walk with my wife and chinese guys have stupid comment about us.
There's much more things I hate here but still possible to live with.  >:(
Spitting in the plane into plastic bag all the way from Europe to China is tradition.  >:(
People say: "Spitting is Chinese national anthem" probably have to agree with them  ;D


Joseph




Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 13, 2011, 10:02:22 AM
Hi Joseph, yes I get the exact same thing with my wife.  Guys say very, very, VERY rude things sometimes (I'm not going to type them here).  Anyway, my wife is much stronger about this stuff than I am. 

I take it you get that sort of thing in Hefei, too?  In Shanghai, we get harrassed pretty much every day.  It's one of the reasons we want to get out of this place.  I look forward to the day when we can sit in a restaurant and be treated with a bit of respect (no staring/picture taking/rude comments, etc).
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 13, 2011, 11:39:26 PM
[can't say anything about the serious topic of inter racial couples, but i am sorry to hear that..]

i forgot one thing also annoying:

one of my colleagues from time to time (it means once per day!) starts suddenly singing very loud in the office. we are about 10 people in the office and when he sings it is KTV style, loud and with passion!

ok, he has a very good voice.. and the first 3-4 times i thought it nice, funny, cute..... now, i just fantasize to get to his desk and smash his face on his keyboard!

 ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: lewin on January 14, 2011, 12:15:38 AM
yeah, now verbal abuse is something legit to gripe about. I've experienced it especially in Shanghai. You probably go out to do something nice with your wife--like go the movies or drink tea together--and you come home to find out she had been silently copping shit from people on the street the entire time. (And not just silly comments, really hateful stuff). She understands every word, but hides it from you because she doesn't want you to go ballistic on someone's ass in public. It can continue to affect both of you for the rest of the day or evening.  

It happens infrequently here in Hefei and your choice to move here is a good one.

Quote
so, relax mate, keep your smile and tell us what YOU did not like and learnt to accept!
 OK Andy. Something difficult to accept at first...inviting Chinese to a restaurant and then at the end they physically restrain you from paying because they are being considerate. So you've gotta play the 'no, no, no it's my turn to pay' game. It can get a little repetitive. Now I take care of the bill well in advance.

<ps. Canadian, I accept your invitation to dinner, but I won’t fight you for the bill  ;)>

People stare in my shopping basket, I let them and go about my business. In fact, once a little old lady reached in and removed the dofu gan I bought because she thought it would be too spicy for a laowai <ha> She was just trying to be considerate.

Quote
.. keep them for church meeting maybe..
I wouldn't know what is said in church meetings. But you seem to.

Quote
for those sentences, i can get a fortune cookie..
You see my sentences in fortune cookies?? Someone should be paying me royalties for that.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 14, 2011, 01:19:34 AM
dude, finally you seem to accept some fun!

of course i know about church meeting, i'm italian!!!
and have a good memory..
but from the way you talk i am surprised you don't know!

and i think you should pay royalties, because your sentences are so..... hollywood family movies!
;-)
but of course we are in china and nobody cares about royalties or piracy!
(and i love it!!)

but i see you are so in peace with the world to finding only the positiveaspects.. that's great!
start a thread what we love about china and hefei.. i got tons of stuff!!

have a laugh today mate!
let me know when u join canadian for dinner.. i can come as well and not fighting for the bill..  ;D
Title: Tongue in cheek
Post by: Aussie Mike on January 14, 2011, 03:54:40 AM
This thread will not be killed by us... We encourage freedom of speech and expressing your views.
I consider it valuable that someone takes the effort to register just to post their opinion.

Please consider that we are here because we want to be. There is so much we love about this place...

I'm sure there are many things foreigners do which seem impolite but no-one has mentioned these yet  ;D

I'm often asked "How would I describe China in one word?"  The answer is "Extreme"
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 14, 2011, 03:58:35 AM
agree..
but please keep posting according to the thread topic.. let's leave the opinions to other threads...

i wanted to share lists of stuff!!!

let's start new threads for new discussion topics  ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 14, 2011, 09:44:39 AM
I;m not fighting for that bill either, lads, so that just leaves you Aussie Mike!  :D

lol, I bought a bottle of bai jiu today.  The guy selling it said (in Chinese) 'since when do you lao wais drink bai jiu?'  I guess he doesn't get too many foreigners buying it. :)

What do you guys normally do for CNY there? (Andy, you'll love it!  It is a really ... intense holiday.  In fact, I don't think you could work even if you tried!)
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 14, 2011, 11:47:28 PM
my first time in china was during chines enew year, visiting a long time pen friend in wenzhou!
february 2007  ;D

this time, i'll visit.. Anqing.. at a friend place!
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 17, 2011, 12:23:15 AM
yo man,

but as i mentioned before.. all true what you say (that's why we are all still here), but don't be shy.. come on dude..

let us know your dirty thoughts.. what you really hate ;-)))))

 ;)
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 17, 2011, 03:34:24 AM
Yeah well I'm a laowai too and like many others here that I have met, I have done many a thing that would be considered impolite by everyone. It is so easy to be critical of many things that are considered impolite but one thing stands, we can't change the world. Most of us can't even change our own bad habits, let alone be instrumental in dictating change to others.

At the end of the day, we are here by choice so if we don't like it we should move on. By and large it is a fairly tolerant society in many respects, so we are lucky that gang warfare is not too much of an element that targets minority groups like us. Just cast a thought back to western societies and how they discriminated against immigrants. At least we rarely see that kind of response.

Live and let live!

Hi Kaibo,

Good points, but I don't think foreigners here should just muffle their grievances simply because 'it isn't our country'.  My wife is Chinese and I am here long term, so in many ways this is my country.  I'd bet you'd receive some serious feedback if you told Chinese people in western countries 'stop complaining or leave' when they raise their voices about things that they feel make them uncomfortable.  We are at a very early stage of the internationalization of this country.  Voicing grievances will only help this country develop for the better, right?  I hope you're not the kind of guy who lets your 'live and let live' philosophy allow you to turn a blind eye when you see foreigners acting rudely towards locals in the street.

Sure, there are lots of things to love about China, and your point about China being a safe and (for the most part) accepting country is bang on.  But I have these sorts of 'I love China' conversations with people all day, every day.  Why not share a few things that irk us?  ;)

Back to the thread...
OK, everybody, my wife's told me we say 'yeah' too much when we speak. :)
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Aussie Mike on January 18, 2011, 09:32:37 AM
The thing which is never considered...

I'm not here to change China or it's culture, I'm here to help those who want to interact with foreigners.

How are the Chinese to know about these not so trivial issues, if no one talks about them.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Hills on January 22, 2011, 08:39:44 AM
 
I tried to get some feedbacks from my students on"what chinese consider impolite about foreigners"and one good point came up...We live in China but don't speak their language..rather expect them to understand every single phrase we say...from the hotel waiter to the grandma at the supermarket..and if they can't help us due to language barriers we bash out in an unpleasant and pissed off manner
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: ryan_madden on January 22, 2011, 09:12:16 AM
That is a good point: we are living in another country/culture, with a different language, yet some of us don't make in-roads to learn the language of the locals, and thus can be frowned upon for potentially "shunning" their livelihood/background in favour of English as a Second Language.

In my defence, I'm very new to Hefei myself (Nov 4th 2010-present), and am still adjusting to life in another country/culture.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: YetAnotherCanadian on January 22, 2011, 10:18:16 AM
Yeah, but guys c'mon: it's 2011.  Chinese will never be the language of the world.  I can understand if grandma can't say a phrase or two, but if you're 20 and working at McDonald's you should learn some basic English.  I realize that this is more an educational problem than anything.  Chinese people typically study English in school for more than 10 years and still can say anything (thumbs up to the Chinese education system!!  :-\ )  Anyway, I don't blame the people I blame the government for not enforcing a working English program (more similar to Korea would be great: lessons on TV, publicly funded speaking classes/English Corners).  The Chinese chose to destroy their old culture during the Cultural Revolution - now they want to preserve it? ??? What kind of logic is that?

Before you start bashing me: I've committed the time to learn Chinese.  My wife does not speak English (we only speak Chinese at home).  Although she studied English for ten years in An Hui public school, she couldn't say a word when I first met her.  I agree that learning the customs, language and culture of the place you live in is a must.  But learning the customs, language and culture of the world as a whole is equally important if we are going to come together as a global family.  I've shown a world map to local people before and they're always surprised by how large the United States is!  'It's almost as big as China!'  they say.  A basic understanding of the world doesn't mean giving up your cultural identity (or your language, for that matter), it means understanding the culture we are all creating together as a global community.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 25, 2011, 12:30:51 AM
Chinese will be the swearing language of the future!!!

watch Firefly people, best {canceled} TV series EVER!!!!!
 ;D

anyway, i agree about the language problem...
also in norway i learned norwegian to understand more of the culture.. chinese is still a huge challenge..

my chinese friends said they started thinking what they don't like about us but came up with nothing yet  :(
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: ryan_madden on January 25, 2011, 04:22:19 AM
Anyway, I don't blame the people I blame the government for not enforcing a working English program (more similar to Korea would be great: lessons on TV, publicly funded speaking classes/English Corners).

I thought CCTV-9 was freely available to anyone with a TV in China? My mistake. :P

In saying that, just being taught English in school doesn't mean the person will think "I have no need for this later on in life". Worked exceptionally well for me and sciences in Years 11 and 12.  ;D
Title: China sets classes in good manners for schoolchildren
Post by: ryan_madden on January 26, 2011, 12:05:28 AM
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-12269505 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-pacific-12269505)

Maybe they read our topic?  :P

In all seriousness though, will children even remember these later in life?
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 26, 2011, 01:29:43 AM
Ryan, thx for the cool link!!!

time to post the original (our) and the copy (bbc) on my blog as well!!!
 ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on January 26, 2011, 01:38:06 AM
btw,

one of the things I really hate and this morning I got reminded is the spitting in the elevator floors.. like my building elevator..

I remember I experienced that my very first time in China, in Wenzhou, when some people where spitting in the hotel elevator floor..
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on September 01, 2011, 08:39:02 AM
one very fresh add (yesterday night experience):

peeing in the sauna, against a wall (thank god not the oven side or the benches.. but still it made my sauna shorter!!!)

(drunk business man with equally drunk friend..)

argh.......  :-X
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: mjsuke75 on September 01, 2011, 02:35:15 PM
in beijing, somebody took a dump in my elevator. yeah, and were kind enough to wipe themself and just drop the used toliet paper in a circle around their marking....
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Aussie Mike on September 01, 2011, 11:07:49 PM
This I would hope is offensive across all cultures. How ever, it seems more acceptable here as I got someones log in my stairwell and I seen adults squatting a log in the street and everyone else seems to ignore them.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: terryd on November 25, 2011, 03:58:18 AM
Hey everyone, I have been in China for about half a year and here's the things that I find pretty bad!

>>
I know this has already been covered BUT spitting is such a crazy thing here!
>>
The fact that everyone stares, On one occasion I was waiting at a bus stop and this lady just walked up to me and in front of me just stood there, looking at me from head - to - toe until my bus arrived!
>>
I needed to get a train and everyone just has to get there first!  Now I finally got to my seat and half way in the journey a guy came up to me and pointed at the seat next to me (which was empty) and said "yao bu yao?" which of course in this situation means "is anyone sitting there?"  I wanted to say "YAO!" but I said bu yao, now I wouldn't have minded this except her smelt SO bad and he kept spitting, he also made himself RIGHT at home by putting the seat back and his feet up!  The thing is, he hadn't paid for a seat so that really pisses me off!
>>
Some people just can't believe the fact that you are there...  I even looked at my watch and someone had to see what I was looking at!
>>
Now this is one of my top HATES.  When you go somewhere and just because your foreign they have $$ in their eyes!  They bump the price up BIG TIME!!  Now I take my Chinese friend with me and tell him what I like and he then goes and bargains for me!!   8)

I know most of these have already been said but ow well  ;D

Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on November 25, 2011, 06:44:34 AM
good you write, said or not before!!

welcome to the forum as well ;)))

prepare yourself for more stares in Hefei... here we are still aliens!!!

and the "flying behind your back hellooooooooooooo".. as i call them now.. the ones that you hear, hushed, only after you pass the people..

i used to turn fast and stare at them to scare them or just say hello back.. now unless it's either a very pretty girl or some smiling children i just don't care anymore..

 ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: terryd on November 25, 2011, 08:35:28 AM
LOL yeah thats pretty funny, today someone looked like they were stumping up the courage to say something and when I passed them they said "gooda afternoona"  lol love it.

I forgot to say > I was standing, talking to someone on the phone and this woman came right in front of me with her baby and let her wee!!  I was thinking "HELLLLLOOOOOOOOOO can you not see me and my shoes!"  hahaha
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Aussie Mike on November 26, 2011, 06:36:28 AM
I now tend to notice the ones that ignore me or just aren't interested.  ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: terryd on November 26, 2011, 11:34:44 AM
What's funny is, I even find myself staring at us "foreigner's!"  It really is strange to see!  I kinda know what they feel now  :D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on November 27, 2011, 12:34:51 AM
I love to take the bus!!!
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Aussie Mike on November 27, 2011, 01:41:58 AM
Speaking of the buses...

I have noticed that students (girls more than boys though) are actively offering seats to the elderly more lately.

It's a good thing to see.  ;D
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on November 28, 2011, 11:30:20 PM
i have seen several boys doing the same and saturday one also helping an old lady to get on the seat...
and often they wanted to give me their seat.. for the LAO part of laowai i guess ;))))
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: terryd on November 29, 2011, 02:36:59 AM
Yeah, I have noticed this with letting the oldies sit down.  This doesn't happen in Shanghai or Beijing!   I also love getting on buses!  Trains are funny as well!

I've just started to drive and I have a new impolite thing!

TURN YOUR HIGH BEAMS OFF PEOPLE!!  You want me to move forward but if I can't see, I'm not going anywhere dude!  Driving at night is pretty damn stressful!  The daytime is better, just tons of traffic!
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on November 29, 2011, 03:59:53 AM
yeah, i thought about that many times.. but i did not know what was the correct word in english for the strong lights ;)))))

Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Haiying on May 18, 2012, 01:40:57 AM
very interesting topic, although in sinking.   As Chinese, i understand that locals have some habits not good or uncomfortable to foreigners, in fact, even Chinese from other cities have such feeling.  There are some reasons for bad habits, problem in education, lacking communication with people from other places, poverty, weak commercial competition, etc.  We Chinese also sometimes talk about these, and we hope may do something to improve that.    But, on the other hand, it may be quite few foreigners here in Hefei, so locals feel curious or like to show their friendly attitude to you.  At Lujiazui banking area in Shanghai, I guess not many Chinese eager to say hello or have time to stare at you. 

I accept the differences between people, cuz I know there are some reasons there and understandable.  you asked how Chinese view foreigners' bad manners and what are them.  Please forgive me if the following examples are not true:

- drunk. when i was in uk, i and my classmates encountered drunk locals sometimes. i don't know how about expats here
- some expats like to use rude words, such as fuck this fuck that

anything else?  We found that some expats learn bad habbits quickly in China (why not learn good habits Chinese have?) and behave quite differently from that in their own country.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on May 18, 2012, 01:51:07 AM
Haiying,

i think not only in china, foreigners learn first the bad habits!!!

i am italian, but i lived 15 years in norway before moving to china.. experienced a lot of what you say, both on me and just watching around!

about behaving differently than in the home country, also this is completely normal!!
and it applies to every place i hav been and lived.. to every nationality!!
chinese in norway are not like chinese in china (i had a relationship with a chinese girl there and got to know several chinese, both students and workers!).

about what chinese think it is impolite in china and we laowai makes mistake, why don't you have a look at my blog as well (unfortunately you need to jump over the wall!) and your thoughts there as well:

http://aikidude.wordpress.com/2011/03/31/things-impolite-in-china/ (http://aikidude.wordpress.com/2011/03/31/things-impolite-in-china/)

about the being drunk part.. i remember when i just moved to norway i had been shocked by the drinking habits of the locals: at 3am (closing time of almost all places in norway) all roads were filled by completely drunk norwegians of all ages (from youngsters to grandmas!!!) saying it was disgusting is too little!!
seeing women the age of my mother passed out in their own vomit on the curb was something i did not expect..
so i do understand you!!

about the rude talking.... mmhhh... once one understand more chinese.. wo kao here "ge pi" there.. "sha b*" up and down.. you got your share as well!!
the thing is we do not understand it as easily as you do..
 ;)

i admit anyway i am learning faster the slang and bad words than the "normal" chinese.. my bad!!!!

anyway, very happy to have locals interacting in these boards!!!!

we wish to have more!!!
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Haiying on May 18, 2012, 01:58:25 AM
 :)  Thanks for your frankness.
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Andy72 on May 18, 2012, 02:03:01 AM
no thanks!!! 不用谢!!!

we are her (or at least i am) to know more and learn more from each other, and in Hefei it is not always easy to get open heart comments from locals!

so please, keep posting!

about the things that chinese consider impolite, i have learnt most during english corners at a local uni (i'm not an english teacher, but i have enjoyed very much these chances to learn about chinese student life and point of views)
Title: Re: Things considered impolite by foreign people
Post by: Aussie Mike on May 19, 2012, 01:30:45 AM
I got soo many... Bad Habits!  ;D

Love that song.